30/7/2025.
I did the thing. The page is made(It's bad, but it's there). The premise of this page is, that I'll write whatever comes to mind, since i feel that I lack expression. Don't mind the shitty punctuation(I am aware of this fault). The intention is for this to get rambly and incoherent, since i just need to get my thoughts out quickly.
If anyone I know irl is reading, then get off! (I'm going to be extra cringy and less restrained)(piss off!)...
Just a random thought: the html thingy   totally is short for "enby space". I don't know what it actually is, but it is actually enby space...
The reason everything is in english, even though danish is my first language, and no one is going to see this anyway, is because I primarily think in english, and everything I consume(almost) is in english.
It's a crazy day today. I went to a family thing for most of the day, I did a thing on the website, I bought a thing,, that i hopefully fix my bitch ass PC with, I "organised"(heavy quotes) going to the beach to drink with my friends and perhaps most crazy of all I've not seen a single youtube video yet today, and theres only an hour till midnight.
04/8/2025 03:03
From now on I will have time of day beside the date. I started this thing, and then I immediately neglected it. If you know me personally, that really shouldn't be a shock. I don't really know what commitment issues are, but if it means: having issues committing, then i suffer from commitment issues a lot. Every time i start something meant to be a longer project, I ditch the project right at the start. Most of the time I'll give up as soon as I've had a good idea, because I know myself well enough to know, that I'll abandon the project if I were to start it. I suspect, that this behaviour is in large part rooted in how i was raised, but yet I feel not quite dissapointed in myself, seeing as I don't really have expectations of success, but I do see it as a faliure of my character, which makes me unconfident, and rightfully so seeing as I can't truly say, that I'm able to rely on myself. I firmly believe that I'd fare better given control of my own life rather than being held back by the pressures of family. Being property sucks. The liberation of the kid is something, I often see overlooked and played down also within communist spaces. I personally really dislike the idea of kids and of having kids, seeing as they are by nature of the modern family opressed. Having children is tough predicament, and as such I gravitate torwards feeling uncomfortable around people who have chosen to become parents.
I fear that this is the peak of my life, which is scary because I don't particularly antagonise death. That being said I don't seek out death, though perhaps i romaticise it somewhat. I believe death to be truly neutral, seing as emotions cannot be felt from within it regardless of their quality(no emotions good or bad). Death offers not sadness and complete security at the cost of potential happiness. I have big happiness in my life in the form of interactions with my friends, though to outrule suffering as a factor in my life would be foolish. My life mainly cosists of emotionlessly watching youtube, which I'd describe as a slight possitive, because of it's function as a source of knowledge and escapism in the face of being the kid of parents. I started writing tonight, because I wanted to write about sleep deprivation. My tendency to sleep for subpar amounts of time has been a positive in my life in some ways, because it has helped replace sadness with emptyness, and it has made me less restrained, thereby allowing myself to further my relations. Sleep deprivation has however negatives as well, the prime thing for me being an inability to focus, granted that was never something, I excelled at. At times i wonder whether I have ADD or ADHD, and I can't tell if I'm overplaying common experiences, actually have one of the things or if I just have similar symptoms because of my insufficient sleep.
I changed my hair, which is cool. Anyway I should head to sleep.